The remains of my uncle and ninong (godfather in bapstism) were interred early yesterday. Percival Cesar Dela Cruz, Ll. B. passed-away due to complications of Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) last Tuesday, the 21st of September 2010. He was 63 years old.
My memories of childhood will never be complete without those with papa Cesar, as he was fondly called. I always anticipate his family’s regular visits to our grandparents’ home where I lived as an occasion to play with my cousins. Likewise, we look forward to the family reunions during the holidays. As his inaanak (godson in baptism) I received gifts from him on occasions. I remember the times when I was treated for a ride in his old Buick car with my cousins. And that unforgettable visit we made in their ancestral home in the town of Victoria in the province of Tarlac. He was somebody who was constantly being in one with those in grief. His willingness to lend his comforting presence shall be missed by whose lives he touched.
My memories of childhood will never be complete without those with papa Cesar, as he was fondly called. I always anticipate his family’s regular visits to our grandparents’ home where I lived as an occasion to play with my cousins. Likewise, we look forward to the family reunions during the holidays. As his inaanak (godson in baptism) I received gifts from him on occasions. I remember the times when I was treated for a ride in his old Buick car with my cousins. And that unforgettable visit we made in their ancestral home in the town of Victoria in the province of Tarlac. He was somebody who was constantly being in one with those in grief. His willingness to lend his comforting presence shall be missed by whose lives he touched.
Papa Cesar will never be forgotten. He lives on though the people he left behind; his wife, Rosalina Quetulio Dela Cruz; his children, Mae Juliet Quetulio Dela Cruz, M.D., Jae Judith Q. Dela Cruz-Mallonga and Robert Mallonga, Eng. Fe Jocelyn Q. Dela Cruz-Francisco and Joselito Francisco; his grandchildren, Nicolas and Jarome.
The death of uncle Cesar came in a time when we are still mourning the passing of another uncle eight months ago. Atty. Ledovino L. Donadillo bravely, as the soldier that he was, battled lung cancer until he succumbed on the 23rd of January 2010. He was 78 years old.
Uncle Ledo was the proverbial “self-made man”. His life story was about personal struggles, triumph and service. It was an inspiring life worth telling about. His hard experiences had honed him to be a man capable of sharing common humanity. His career as a lawyer was one of public service. His legal acumen he earned beyond the ethical and technical demands of the profession but by the wisdom he constantly sought from his faith in the divine. Yes, his being spiritual was what gave heart to his law practice.
The most endearing quality uncle Ledo possessed was his ability to feel for others. While he was cantankerous and oftentimes had hard words to say, you would have to know him to be understanding, generous and tender-hearted as he could be.
I will never forget that during my lowest moment, when my own father died in 1998, he welcomed me in their home and stayed there to start picking-up the broken pieces of myself. It was a turbulent and painful time. When I was censured for not attending my father’s burial because of too much grief, he was one to have understood and came to my defense. As I write this, I have a vivid image of him in my mind, his expression was one of great sympathy, when he said, “Didn’t they realize that there is such a thing as private grief?” Such can only come from somebody who was profound and truly knew the human heart.
Uncle Ledo will always be remembered. He was survived by his wife, Aurora Quetulio Donadillo; his children, Atty. Patricia Q. Donadillo-Famaran and Alfonso Famaran, M.D., and Grace Quetulio Donadillo.
Uncle Ledo was the proverbial “self-made man”. His life story was about personal struggles, triumph and service. It was an inspiring life worth telling about. His hard experiences had honed him to be a man capable of sharing common humanity. His career as a lawyer was one of public service. His legal acumen he earned beyond the ethical and technical demands of the profession but by the wisdom he constantly sought from his faith in the divine. Yes, his being spiritual was what gave heart to his law practice.
The most endearing quality uncle Ledo possessed was his ability to feel for others. While he was cantankerous and oftentimes had hard words to say, you would have to know him to be understanding, generous and tender-hearted as he could be.
I will never forget that during my lowest moment, when my own father died in 1998, he welcomed me in their home and stayed there to start picking-up the broken pieces of myself. It was a turbulent and painful time. When I was censured for not attending my father’s burial because of too much grief, he was one to have understood and came to my defense. As I write this, I have a vivid image of him in my mind, his expression was one of great sympathy, when he said, “Didn’t they realize that there is such a thing as private grief?” Such can only come from somebody who was profound and truly knew the human heart.
Uncle Ledo will always be remembered. He was survived by his wife, Aurora Quetulio Donadillo; his children, Atty. Patricia Q. Donadillo-Famaran and Alfonso Famaran, M.D., and Grace Quetulio Donadillo.
These two deaths within the year make us reflect how important family ties can be. I see a good side to mourning, now. It isn’t all that bad, really. It gives us the opportunity to rekindle the flames of our relations neglected by our hurried lives. We were brought together despite the distances or estrangement. Amidst the sorrow we bear in loosing those dear to us is the strength we have in solidarity with one another.
Beyond the experience of mourning there is hope. And after this sad episode, joy awaits. We can look forward and move on with much courage. Like a book, the life of our dearly departed ends while we, the bereaved, only closes a chapter then turn a page for a new one to begin. It is likely that in this new chapter there shall be a greater awareness of our own mortality. Not to be fearsome rather reinforce in us that life is too valuable to waste; that we alter each other’s life forever. The lifetime shared with us through the years by those who have gone ahead of us makes the people we are today. By contemplating their life, we learn life’s lessons without having us to experience them ourselves. Or if we do, prepare us in dealing with them.
To mourn is to feel desolate and alone. Yet, if we be able to see mourning in a different perspective, we will better understand why we feel such an emotion as a response to the death of a beloved. In the process, we can appreciate better the life we had with those who have gone before us and those who remain with us in this earthly pilgrimage. And in these, mourning can be a good thing.
Uncle Ledo and uncle Cesar will be missed, now that they will no longer be here to share moments with. Without them our family gatherings will never be the same again. Yet, they’ll live on in our memories. We can always look back at all the cherished times we had with them. These shall be the impetus to bring our families closer together and move on to make more lasting memories that shall out-live each of us when our own lifetime has finally come to an end.
Beyond the experience of mourning there is hope. And after this sad episode, joy awaits. We can look forward and move on with much courage. Like a book, the life of our dearly departed ends while we, the bereaved, only closes a chapter then turn a page for a new one to begin. It is likely that in this new chapter there shall be a greater awareness of our own mortality. Not to be fearsome rather reinforce in us that life is too valuable to waste; that we alter each other’s life forever. The lifetime shared with us through the years by those who have gone ahead of us makes the people we are today. By contemplating their life, we learn life’s lessons without having us to experience them ourselves. Or if we do, prepare us in dealing with them.
To mourn is to feel desolate and alone. Yet, if we be able to see mourning in a different perspective, we will better understand why we feel such an emotion as a response to the death of a beloved. In the process, we can appreciate better the life we had with those who have gone before us and those who remain with us in this earthly pilgrimage. And in these, mourning can be a good thing.
Uncle Ledo and uncle Cesar will be missed, now that they will no longer be here to share moments with. Without them our family gatherings will never be the same again. Yet, they’ll live on in our memories. We can always look back at all the cherished times we had with them. These shall be the impetus to bring our families closer together and move on to make more lasting memories that shall out-live each of us when our own lifetime has finally come to an end.
